What's this movie lacking? o/~...meaning. o/~

"Yet another weekend of RHPS at Vassar over. This wasthe second and final weekend, and thank ghods. IT was a blast but I don't think I could survive another one of these. As the infamous expression goes: 'I must have had fun, I feel like shit.'
Got out of work late on Friday, but managed to condense my errands enough that I made the time up and got there about the same time as last week. Much like last week I can't recall exactly what I did on Fri before Rocky, it involved a fair amount of random hanging out (but no alcohol run this time).
The show friday was lots of fun, and I even played the pack of dogs chasing Rocky (woofwoofwoof!) in addition to doing AP. Afterwords I and ONDBIT (a friend whom I have alluded to before, now I have a nickname for her care of her vanity license plate) decided not to go to the diner and instead crawled back to her place and slept.
I was supposed to go to [R]'s boyfriend's memorial on Saturday if I could. But I didn't awake until around 2pm (which was when it was starting) and even then would not have been up for a drive to NYC.

oops. Tme for work. Will finish tonight. (prolly)

...pation.

"So after getting up late on Saturday, I hung around with ONDBIT, her roommate L-Chan (also a new nickname for someone I have refered to before) and a friend of L-Chan from UMass who was down visiting for RHPS. The four of us spent lots of time playing music at each other, talking and snuggling, altogether a fun way to pass the time.
I also spent other time doing other stuff, but I can't recall whatall it was due to sleep dep. I do recall being in THG's room trying to sneak a nap on her bed when she and the girl she hooked up with started making out next to me. I jokingly complained about not being a voyeur as the making out was being wasted on me. I will say though that THG has good taste in women. :)
RHPS Sat was tons of fun, I ranaround like even more of a madman than before. However while doing the bottle catch (running and jumping across stage to pretend to try and catch the bottle the Riff onstage is dropping) I managed to bruise my hip pretty badly. And of course because I was a Rocky I paid almost no attention to it and continued to run around (including doing to more flying leaps for other scenes).
After Rocky we went over to the cast party being held at the oncampus apartment of the director. It was a fun party and I spent almost all of it sitting on a staircase a bit away from the main part of the party talking with an ever-changing group of interesting ppl. At one point I had ONDBIT and the woman THG had hooked up with, sitting in front of me while I tried to scritch them with my claws. I mentioned something jokingly about it being easier w/o the shirts i the way, at which point both of them took of their shirts and sat there in their bras while I played with them. This amused the heck out of me.
I ended up crashing at the apartment, actually I got to snuggle with a friend whoi also lives there that I enjoy spending time with but never seem to manage to see(though apparently she is dating someone who lives in the same town as [C}, so hopefully I'll get to see her more often). I tried to call out to work in the AM. No one answered the phone though at work when I tried and I fell back asleep before I had a chance to try again. So I finally actually awoke around 1 or 2 pm. I hung aroudn with the director, the person I had crashed with, and [E] for a while then [E] and my snuggle partner for the evening went off to the Everready Diner for breakfast around 3pm. After A delightful breakfast I took them to see the hidden waterfall I found near Poughkeepsie*.
Heading back I realized I had barely enough time to drop them off and get back to CT in time for the CT Poly's get together for Monsters Inc. I did make it though, but just barely.
The movie was lots of fun, after a short bit of chatting in the lobby I headed home and shortly thereafter passed out.

And that brings me up to date on the weekend. The hip is still sore but better than it was. My manager didn't even mention the fact I wasn;t in on Sunday. I have decided I need to go job hunting. I really need to get off my ass and go looking at colleges.



*It's a really cool waterfall and woods that is right next to a major street but basicly invisible to anyone driving by. I found it once when I ran out of gas on that strip of road.

1...2...3....4....oh shit (turned into a core dump. This may not make sense, and if it does it still

"So something started me thinking about the fact that when someone I thought knew acts in some way towards me that seems to be at complete offs with how I expect them to act I tend to push away from them. Hard.
I often stop interacting with them if possible, or if not possible interact with them on a purely social level. In other words, treat them like a casual friend and not with the closeness that I had been (I need to be/fell somewhat close to the person for this sort of situation to occur in the first place).

So anyway, I was thinking about this, and realizing that off the top of my head I can come up with 3 (possibly 4) people that I'm currently doing this to. I'm sure there are more but either they are far enough back I've stopped even thinking about it, or I don't even realize I'm doing it.
All of these ppl did something that struck me as being at complete odds with how I expected them to act, and also as being highly irational (to my own personal view of irrational.
And I've been actively distancing myself from them. I wouldn't have issues with it if I felt it was a distancing they diserved or that made sense, but in some of the cases I don't think it warrents it, and/or I seem to be actively confusing/hurting the person by doing it.
I don't know what to do about it, I'm not sure if I should do somehting about it, I'm not sure what to do about it.

I fear that this might be another aspect of the trend I have been starting to notice in my behavior of having and spending less and less time with (and finding) very close friends, and expending more time being sort of genericly social such as to gain lots of casual friends, and also viewing most interactions with MOTOS as a potential sexual relationship (which is stupid, because I don't really enjoy sex, so I would be doing it to make them feel good mostly, and if I feel that I've rushed them into it I worry that I might ruin even that bit of pleasure that can come out of it).

I think I hit a core dump state. This is likely to get even more incoherent and personal, and vary widly from the original topic.
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